GrievingSoul's Blog

if i was a ghost id haunt and torture everyone
who has made me shed ONE tear
who has drilled thoughts of suicide in my head
whos has abused me...
you wont see my face
you wont knoe it is
when ur alseep
u will have night mares...night mares of death and torture
it would feel so real...ud wake up in a sweat
n hear faint evil laugher in ur room..
u will get on ur knees and beg for forgiveness
but i WILL never forgive u
NEVER
my hatred is so engraved in my soul
it will never disappear...

the other day not too long ago...
i was standing on the sidewalk in the middle of the night
no cars came by it was so lonely so dark
if i screamed no one will hear me
if i cry no one will care
if i were to sit here in the middle of the street and wait for a car
would they see me?
would they care to stop
or will the s.o.b just run me over
id prob would die
but id think id get up n get the fuck out dah way
n think woah that was close
*hahahaha*

im tired of being judged by the world...please just leave me alone
i dont talk to u n u dont talk to me
just shut up! i dont wanna hear ur words or ur empty stares
i want to be left alone
im sick of being harassed by perverts every single!!! wtf is wrong with u?? just leave me alone...
would it be better if i just died and disappeared so u can leave me alone???
im sick of it
just fvckin go to hell n die die die!!

I felt like cutting myself today..
i really dont like the person from the outside who is a lil disturbed inside...
i look pretty normal i dont act wierd...
just insdie my mind there is a lil room where my inner me goes to and locks the doors...that just wants to cut herself that just wants to die...
i wonder what it would feel like being dead..is it true that we wont feel hunger pain or nething??
i dont knoe im actually terrified of dieing...the not knowing scares me