I've been grappling with this one thing for almost a year now and I thought I'd let it loose on AA just to see what people think. It's about a stupid love affair that started last summer so if you're not into drama and sleazy sex then don't read on. Anyway here's the story:
I was at a friend's wedding reception late last august and met a girl there who was totally checking me out. Being a fairly ugly guy I was feeling really flattered and ecstatic that a girl who was as attractive as her would take notice of a guy like me. I couldn't believe it...it felt like my ego was on steroids. The only problem though is that she was there with her boyfriend. Yeah.. :(
I realized that as soon as I sat down to say hi and she introduced me to her friends and then her guy, who BTW seemed like the most sincere and loving BF I've ever met. I felt SO bad as we all chatted away and I told myself I wouldn't do anything stupid to get in the way. As long as I did that, the night couldn't get any worse right? WRONG!!!
EVERY TIME she leaned over to kiss her BF I would see her staring at me with that lustful, seductive eyes of hers. It was such a damn awkward situation and I didn't know what the hell to do. Uggh I still cringe when I think about it.
Anyway, I don't know why she was doing that. Maybe it was all the booze she kept toasting to me but I couldn't believe what was going on so I tried to stay quiet about it and mingle with other people. When it was all done with and everyone was getting ready to go, she offered me and my sister a ride back to the groom's place and we all ended up exchanging contacts.
So a couple weeks later the girl and I started chatting on MSN (stupid I know). She tried to flirt with me a few times and being such a great conversationalist I deflected them easily with funny one liners..Ha Ha :)
I thought it was all innocent stuff but then a few days after that I started getting text messages from her while at work. Sh**, deja vu all over again...
At that point I didn't want to ignore her because I wasn't that type of guy so I tried to be nice about it. We continued chatting on MSN and it seemed like I was spending way too much time talking and texting to her.
Every night after work I would get her messages on my phone and when I got home I would find myself on the computer chatting with her. And the conversations we were having wasn't small talk...it was really profound, deep and intimate stuff. It was insane connecting with her like that over the internet and I felt as If I was stabbing her BF in the back.
It was even worse because she told me the guy had left to Edmonton (other side of country) looking for work experience as an engineer, so she was committing herself to a long distance relationship with him...All the while with me in the background.
Then the whole thing got elevated when she tried to arrange meets. Now this probably would've happened already if she lived closer but we were hours drive apart so I thought she was joking at the time. But then I found out through her cousin that she drove her boyfriend 5 hours to a city just south of me to drop him off at the airport. They have a major airport in their city already! what the heck is going on??
At that point I decided to be upfront about the whole situation and tell her how I felt. She kept trying to make it seem as if she didn't know what I was talking about and telling me how she's not the type of girl that easily opens up and let her emotions show...BS. We ended up chatting for hours into the early morning and I STILL don't know exactly how she feels about it all.
I felt like sh** because it was 4am when she told me she had classes in a few hours. *sigh why would she even waste her time with me if it wasn't anything serious? Was she just being a nice girl the entire time? Since the wedding?
Anyway it got too awkward between the two of us and I haven't talked to her much since then.
I'm telling you all about this now because I want to know how I should have handled the situation right from the start. I can't help but feel like such an asshole and it tears me up that the dude she was with is a really great guy! :(
So that's it. Tell me what you think about the whole thing and what I should've done.
Oh and sorry I lied about the sex. I needed to grab your attention :) Good thing it never went that far though, whew.
